Sons of Simmons Classic: Ichiro Is Knute Rockne In The Making

Original Post Date July 16, 2008

In honor of tonight’s All-Star Game.  Prediction AL 6 – NL 4

Why does the American League win the All-Star game every year ? Is it because they have better players ? Is it because they have a deeper squad ? Is it because they have the least number of white boys ? No, the answer is easy: Ichiro. Apparently, it has become common for the Jap with the Rap, to give his pre-game speech every year right after the manger finishes up his talk to the team. Jeff Passan writes:

“It’s why we win,” David Ortiz said.

He pointed to Ichiro Suzuki, the Seattle Mariners’ wisp of an outfielder, a man who still uses a translator to do interviews with English-speaking reporters – and happens to be baseball’s amalgam of Anthony Robbins and George Carlin. Every year, after the AL manager addresses his team, Ichiro bursts from his locker, a bundle of kinetic energy, and proceeds, in English, to disparage the National League with an H-bomb of F-bombs, stunning first-timers who had no idea Ichiro speaks the queen’s language fluently and making returnees happy that they had played well enough to see the pep talk again.

The tradition began in 2001, Ichiro’s first All-Star appearance, and the AL hasn’t lost a game since. Coincidence ?

Now, why doesn’t Fox get this on camera instead of seeing George Brett put the audience to sleep ? I betcha, if they televised this next year it be the highest rated part of the game.

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